As a little girl, I knew three things: 1. I wanted to get married. 2. I wanted to be a Mother. 3. I knew I was meant for big things and would be successful. I worked hard in school and gave everything I did my all. I failed a lot but I also had a lot of successes. I made plenty of mistakes, disappointed my parents and disappointed myself. But I also LEARNED A LOT. Looking back now over the last 34 years of my life, I’m not sure I would change a single thing about any of those failures, mistakes or disappointments because they have all led me to where I am today.
When I made the decision to go to graduate school in 2005 and become a Doctor of Audiology I knew a significant amount of student loan debt was in my future. And I knew that because of that I was going to have to work for a very long time to pay that off. But i was living out that childhood dream of doing something big and being successful. Of course, the getting married part was still missing and it made for some very lonely times. But I kept plugging away and kept following that dream of being successful all the way to Nashville, TN. I just knew I was meant to be here. Sure enough, not long after, I met the guy and the rest is history! Before Woody and I got married we knew we wanted to have children and because we were both close to 30 at the time of our wedding, we knew we wouldn’t wait too long. So we set a date of waiting at least one year before trying to get pregnant. It was important to us to have that year together as a married couple.
When Carson arrived in October of 2013 our worlds were turned upside down. On the same day we brought our little boy into the world, my life hung in the balance due to HELLP Syndrome. God was definitely watching over me and our little boy that day. As scary as that day was I am so grateful that it happened because it completely changed my perspective. Life is short and not only that; it is incredibly precious! I couldn’t believe that on that day all of my childhood dreams had officially come true! But then reality sunk in: I had everything I’d ever dreamed of. The husband, the baby and the big career that came with a huge price tag. That last one meant that I couldn’t just focus on my marriage and baby I had to go back to work. It tore me up inside more than I thought it would and I never really expressed it to my husband because we both knew there was no choice; I had to go back to work. It was not financially possible for me to stay home with Carson. So we checked out daycares, enrolled him and I went back to work part-time when he was 9 weeks old.
When I dropped Carson off at daycare that first day at the end of 2013, I made a promise to him and myself that I WOULD be home one day. That I would do whatever it took to make that happen. It has been a long road for sure but I have never given up on that dream. The biggest obstacle, of course, has been finances. So Step 1 was signing up for Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University. Since January of this year we have been living on a budget, sacrificing where we can, giving up things we don’t need and learning to live on less. And you know what? Because I did not give up on that promise I made back in 2013 to be home one day and because I am faithful to God and my family, he is making that happen. This week marks the first week in over 2 years that I did not drop my child off at daycare. God is blessing our little family in ways that I never thought possible and I know things are only going to get better from here.
Never stop believing. Never stop dreaming. And always trust that God will provide for those that are faithful.
